Tag Archives: divorce

Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert

This is not your typical self help book. Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert does discuss deep philosophical questions about life and the choices we make, but her main focus is herself. It’s HER spiritual quest and if the reader finds comfort or develops a similar reality base, well good for them, but that is not her purpose for this saga. Trying to deal with a difficult divorce and the end of a torrid relationship, Gilbert finds herself on a one year journey divided between Italy (where she eats her way through the country while learning the language), India (finding some answers while exploring her spirituality at her Guru’s Ashram) and Bali, Indonesia (where she splits her day visiting a medicine man, a healer, and her lover since, despite her vow of chastity, she is having an affair with an older man from Brazil).

Gilbert is a beautiful, intelligent, witty, well traveled woman with an eye-opening way of expressing herself. I listened to the audiotape read by the author which is well enunciated and extremely literate, perfectly capturing the essence of her words.

This is one of those books I’m ashamed to admit I hadn’t read when it was first published. To make matters worse, I didn’t see the movie either, although I hope to remedy that situation soon. However, the one advantage of coming late to the table with this one, is the irresistible tidbits of information which have recently been disclosed to the public.

Elizabeth Gilbert is a woman who has led a fascinating life and continues to astound us with her choices. She was a bartender during her youth at a bar in the East Village of NYC (revealed in an article entitled The Muse of the Coyote Ugly Saloon, Gentleman Quarterly, 1997), and the movie Coyote Ugly (2000) is based on those experiences where she met her first husband. Divorced after almost nine years of marriage, Gilbert took a sabbatical from life to figure things out (on her publishers dime of $200,000) which resulted in Eat, Pray, Love (2006). She ended up marrying her fellow world traveler in 2007 (after he was detained and threatened with deportment), despite his multi-country connection – children in Australia, family in his native Brazil, a gem business in Bali, and then her, a wife in New Jersey, where they jointly owned an East Asian Decorative Import Store (Two Buttons) which was sold in 2015. In between Gilbert has written a best selling fiction book, The Signature of All Things (2013) which I have read (but not yet reviewed) plus in 2015 published another “self help” tome, Big Magic, whose audio was sent for me to review although it is still waiting unopened in its box. In addition, Gilbert wrote another memoir in 2010, Committed, which examines her life and marriage after Bali. A 2015 article for the New York Times, Confessions of a Seduction Addict, scrutinizes her obsession with flirtation and the results of the lustful urges which destroyed her marriage. However, the juiciest bit of gossip is the fact that she has recently divorced husband number two to be with the love of her life, her hairdresser and girl friend Rayya Elias, (remember Liz’s unmanageable mane) who was mentioned several times in Eat, Pray, Love. She has shared with the public that Rayya has terminal cancer and Gilbert wants to be there to provide love and support, which included a recent Ceremony of Love, although not a formal marriage.

Let’s just say that Elizabeth Gilbert has been living her life between the pages of her memoirs and needs some time to catch up with herself.

My immediate response to Elizabeth Gilbert after reading her memoir, Eat, Pray, Love, is for her to relax and use that innate sense of humor to lighten up. The search for truth and the meaning of life is overrated, so just sit back, enjoy, and stop fussing. With all the pray and meditation, one would think she’d have had her problems put back in their place, but no – her regrets constantly reared their ugly heads. Move on and don’t look back or at the very least, let it catch up with you instead of looking for trouble since no matter how hard you try to hide from it, it will always find you. As far as any guilt for not wanting children, I think Gilbert made the right decision. Some women aren’t meant to be mothers and her career path and egocentricity (and I mean that in a nice way) would interfere with a fulfilling family life. Better to focus on being the favorite aunt and spoil those nieces.

Elizabeth Gilbert has a delicious way of looking at life and is the master of a well turned phrase making anything she writes a pleasure to read (or listen to on tape). While some might think this book is boring since, plot wise, not much happens, her pilgrimage along with the fascinating people she meets along the way more than make up for the lack of action. I especially loved the irascible Texan Richard (real name) who is full of droll advice and nicknamed Liz “groceries” to boot. For those readers who consider Gilbert a narcissist, well, if I had two popular movies based on my life released before I was forty years old and got to travel the world hobnobbing with all sorts of intriguing individuals while also making a bundle of dollars, I’d also be a little full of myself. (It’s not as if anyone pays me for what I write here on my blog).

Four stars. This review also appears on Goodreads.

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At the Water’s Edge by Sara Gruen

We all know there are self centered, egotistical, SOB’s out there in the world, but that doesn’t necessarily mean we want to spend time with them, even if it is only amongst the pages of a book.

Seems that’s one of the problems of At the Water’s Edge by Sara Gruen. Ellis Hyde and his pal Hank are privileged, silver-spoons-in-their-mouths, sons of wealthy gentlemen who spend their time in frivolous pursuits, going to parties, drinking too much, and cavalcading throughout high society, annoying the patrons and getting into trouble. The two best friends have a cohort, Madeline, a woman who enjoys their company and madcap adventures. Despite her wealthy father, Maddie has a black mark against her due to the antics of her now deceased mother, so that when she marries Ellis her welcome is anything but friendly. Then on New Years Eve in 1944, the trio are especially obnoxious, and Ellis’ parents are, shall we say, not amused with the resulting gossip, so when Ellis insults his father they are ejected from the family estate and left to fend for themselves.

Ellis, whose father (the Colonel) can’t forgive him for being rejected from the military due to a case of color blindness, decides to go to Scotland and find the Loch Ness Monster, an adventure that tainted his father’s reputation several years earlier. If Ellis could just prove the monster exists, then his now proud papa would welcome him back with open arms and reinstate his allowance.

Unfortunately there is a war going on, so they must travel overseas bunked down like commoners in a military convoy and to make matters worse, once they arrive in Scotland their welcome is less than cordial. The search for the monster is a lot more difficult than expected, and the two friend’s behavior gets more and more outrageous fueled by alcohol and the little pills prescribed to Maddie for her “nervous condition”. Maddie soon distances herself from her husband and Hank, finding more in common with the humble folks who live and work at the inn. The true personalities of each of the characters are revealed as they deal with their struggles and Maddie comes to terms with her choices in life making a decision which totally alters the fate of everyone involved leading to a twisted resolution.

While the story takes place towards the end of WWII, the war is more of a backdrop than an integral part of the story although there are black out curtains, ration books, gas masks, and several air raids. Scotland, complete with castle, is the main focus of the narrative as the inhabitants try to eke out a living in difficult times.

This was a hard book to get into, not grabbing ones’ interest until almost half way through, probably because of the despicable characters. I did borrow the audiobook, dramatically read by Justine Eyre, to get me over the hump, then finished with the written word.

I’m not sure if I buy this tale, it’s a little far fetched and I question the shift in Ellis from a spoiled brat into an evil man. Although I usually look for the good in people (in life as well as in literature), by the end of the book he had no redeeming qualities left to discuss. There was also a romance which seemed to come out of nowhere, even though there were some subtle hints of this possibility along the way.

Three stars and a thank you to Netgalley for providing this ARC in exchange for an honest review.

This review also appears on Goodreads.

26 Kisses by Anna Michels

Cute, cute, cute!

Mark breaks up with Veda Bentley on his graduation day. They’ve been together for almost two years and she is devastated, although he’s off to college and she’s got another year left of high school. She quits her job at the movie theatre where she and Mark worked together and mopes around in her room for long enough to cause concern to her two best friends, Melinda and Seth. On the busy Fourth of July, Vee helps out Mel at her father’s boat rental shop on Lake Michigan. Their hometown, the Michigan Dunes, is a resort destination which becomes a busy tourist trap during the summer months. Suddenly Vee finds herself with a new job at Flaherty’s Float and Boat working alongside an agreeable coworker, Killian, who shares a common interest in the debate team, although he attends a nearby rival high school. Yet Vee isn’t ready for a new relationship, so she maintains her distance, especially since Mel has talked her into a Kissing Challenge, as a distraction from the Mark fiasco, which involves “collecting” kisses from individuals whose names start with each letter of the alphabet including a fellow student named Adam, a dog called Elmo, and Zane, an underclassman from the debate team. Vee suddenly finds herself appreciating the “singles” lifestyle even though Killian would plainly like to take their friendship to the next level. Of course, the road is not a smooth one, with friend and family issues as well as uncomfortable rumors which might affect Vee’s reputation, but all’s well that ends well with a lighthearted culmination to finish out the summer (as well as complete the alphabet) which is sure to satisfy the reader.

26 Kisses by Anna Michels is a fun and diverting story perfect for any age, from the preteen up to their grandmother, with no overt sex beyond a few kissing scenes, but just enough romance to cause an “ahhhhh” and satisfy the heart. My main complaint (as a parent) was that there was quite a bit of underage drinking. While this is definitely not “The Great American Novel”, it is a perfect YA summer read. Four stars and a thank you to Netgalley and Simon & Schuster Children’s Publishing for providing this ARC in exchange for an honest review.